I want to be the end of everything

my villanelle, 'I want to be the end of everything,' won the kirkwood award in formal poetry. I get some money and am going to be reading it on campus today, in about half an hour. 

I want to be the end of everything
by cj krueger

I want to be the end of everything,

the one who shakes the murder from his bones,

and after me no-one should dare to sing.

 

I never want my body bound with string,

or in a coffin while my family moans.

I want to be the end of everything.

 

if even all my talents, gifts I bring

won’t save my life from all those great unknowns,

then after me, no-one should dare to sing.

 

and how unfair, that bells don’t stop to ring,

that people talk, or shit, or wear cologne.

I want to be the end of everything.

 

so I should be my species’ final fling

with happiness, then all can turn to stone.

I want to be the end of everything.

 

if I can’t live forever as a King,

then no-one else should either sit that throne.

I want to be the end of everything,

and after me no-one should dare to sing.